McCain's Veep pick: Gasps of Horrified Laughter edition.
I'm not talking about merely *bad* choices, here.
By Moe Lane Posted in 2008 | Cleaning the Palate | Don't take this very seriously — Comments (124) / Email this page » / Leave a comment »
And I'm not talking about choices where you have to go "Dude, that's not even wrong." I'm talking about choices so horrifically bad that you look upon the metaphorical wreckage and find it to have actual aesthetic merit.
For example, that whoever-she-is that people freak out about doesn't even begin to count; and picking Joe Lieberman isn't quite at that level. We want spit-out-your-coffee, which is why I'm shilling for Howard Dean for this one. Think about it: he'll bring in the progressives once they're over their "Obama lost the nomination snit," we'll go back to the fine old tradition of never giving the Vice President anything resembling a meaningful job in a nanosecond, he'll be entertainingly nuts for at least four years, and we'll have a constant reminder of why things can always get worse.
So, beat that. Just be good-humored about it.
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McCain's Veep pick: Gasps of Horrified Laughter edition. 124 Comments (0 topical, 124 editorial, 0 hidden) Post a comment »
Teddy Kennedy
Howard Dean.
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
-Thomas Paine: The American Crisis, No. 4, 1777
Hey, he did just say he'd be willing to be VP. :P
To shore up all those angry working class white guys...
You're a persistent cuss, pilgrim. John Wayne to James Stewart in The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance.
" Got to love the Lord for making things like that."
Morally Compromised
" Got to love the Lord for making things like that."
Morally Compromised
McCain = Big Tent
Craig = Wide Stance
There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life. - Frank Zappa
Elizabeth Dole
Lindsey Graham
Carly Fiorina
Joe Lieberman
Condi Rice
Christine Todd-Whitman
“.....women and minorities hardest hit”
Chris Shays
Tom Davis
You want more regulation and oversight - we got ideas in spades for ya
You're a persistent cuss, pilgrim. John Wayne to James Stewart in The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance.
Freedom of Religion not Freedom from Religion
C'mon Moe, you can bring the rhyme!
Alternatively, there's the John McCain-John McClane ticket. They're both hard-to-kill bad***es, they're both Republicans, and the Vice Presidency is the perfect job for a fictional character. Yippee kiy-ay....
"No compromise with the main purpose, no peace till victory, no pact with unrepentant wrong." - Winston Churchill
And if we're talking about fictional characters... come on, that one's easy.
Batman.
The Fuzzy Puppy of the VRWC. I've been usurped!
You've got Miller's from the Dark Knight, Barr's from the 80s, and of course the campy adaption inspired by Adam West in the 60s and on and on. Just please, not the Klooney version. Even West was better than Klooney.
Me, if I'm taking a fictional critter, I'm taking Rorschach, even if his head did get evaporated at the end of the series. The big blue guy can put him back together again.
It would be the bada** ticket for sure. In addition, would we really want anyoneother than Batman taking the reigns as the fututre spokesman for the party in 4 years. I know I'd want to promary McCain just for the Batman-Batgirl ticket in 2012, I mean come on-hot blonde girl in leather suit vs Robin??-he's got to run with Batgirl.
"Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice.Let me remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue."-Barry Goldwater
Rudy/Romney for VP-because someone's got to punch the hippies.
How about Chuck Norris?
omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina
You know, to win the women's vote :)
______________________________________
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Jeb Bush for Veep! That'll extend the Bush Derangement Syndrome four more years!
For the worst to be so worst as to be artistically pleasing, there's no other choice than Jon Stewart.
"Progressives" would be obligated to vote for McCain. They already get their real news from their fake news. The shadow of the real office could have the shadow of a real adult. Imagine the speeches.
If you're going to put someone into a fake job, why not use the most fraudulent person (tangentially) related to politics who isn't in danger of accidentally burning the White House to the ground (Dan Rather)?
Jon Stewart for VP!
absentee
Also now available at Political Machine.
The era of the Republicans being the party of national security would be over.
How about Jane Fonda. Then you get the pro-war and the anti-war vote.
Then both sides can re-live Vietnam.
Arlen Specter
Of Republicans, you can't get worse.
TraunerWatch.com
Wyoming people deserve the truth!
Just another Bitter white-boy clinging to guns and God!
Granted, he's not a Republican now.
--
This too shall pass.
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Eliminate the IRS and all payroll taxes! http://www.fairtax.org
" Got to love the Lord for making things like that."
Morally Compromised
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Eliminate the IRS and all payroll taxes! http://www.fairtax.org
What are you talking about? She'd be a SPECTACULAR pick! We'd get her off the court and McCain would IMMEDIATELY get a new SC pick!
I'd personally nominate everyone on the SC not named Roberts, Alito, Thomas or Scalia to positions within the administration if I could get away with it.
"I ain't never votin' fo another Democrat so long as I can draw breath! I'll vote for a dog first!" - Leola Thomas
Barney Frank - his voice alone could wipe out any and all enemies.
Al Sharpton - his twisted logic would confuse the terrorusts.
Jesse Jackson - would put them all to sleep
Ted Kennedy - would drown 'em
Kid Rock (maybe he can get back with Pamela Anderson too)
or, for inroads to the black community...
50 Cent
the corpse of Charlton Heston.
From my cold dead hands...
can play at the victory celebration too.
Which means he ain't a bad choice.
because he's mostly deaf now. He can just rant for the press corps, oblivious to anything they might ask him.
Ted Nugent for Congress or maybe governor!!!
http://www.redstate.com/blogs/herodotus/2007/apr/20/elect_this_gentleman
...a long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right...
---Thomas Paine---
The Ghost of Steven Decatur, Jr.
The Ghost of Black Jack Pershing
(proven Jehadist fighters)
...misspelled Jihad, and some drifting off topic hear, but so it goes.
And this Rothenberg gets paid writing this supreme stupidity. It rolled right past him that McCain is already a bipartisan candidate. Roll Call should hire me. I'll write twice as smart material (which will be drop dead easy) for half the money in half the time.
1. McCain, 2. Thompson, 3. Giuliani, 4. Romney
than serious VP speculation.
I.
Will.
Pwn.
You.
I'm sure H Ross would be all ears!
"I believe we must adjourn this meeting to some other place." - The last recorded words of Adam Smith.
He won't even need Secret Service protection w/ her as a Veep. People will invent secret plots to extend his life to the end of the current term if a coughs too loudly.
"I believe we must adjourn this meeting to some other place." - The last recorded words of Adam Smith.
Oh wait, he's busy getting his butt kicked this year....
Kill the terrorists
Protect the borders
Punch the hippies -- Frank J
Yes, that would be Jerry Springer
Kill the terrorists
Protect the borders
Punch the hippies -- Frank J
That would make the Paulestinians actually vote for a Republican in a general election.
"I believe we must adjourn this meeting to some other place." - The last recorded words of Adam Smith.
"No matter how much lipstick you put on the taxation pig, it's still a pig... and it's currently snout-down in your wallet." - Michael Fisk
Kucinich actually has executive experience. Sure, he ran Cleveland into the ground, but he gained that experience.
especially soaked in delicious tuna oil...
I.
Will.
Pwn.
You.
How about the Headless Body of Agnew? If we can get him back from Wernstrom, that is...
(Hope someone else watches Futurama)
*fist shaking*
(Yeah, there's a few dorks around here. Here on the Internet.)
If you're going to have Agnew's body as veep, though, we'd best get Dick Nixon's head for political advisor. (And you thought they were upset over Rovian mind control!)
--
This too shall pass.
Actually, that may be unfair because he was reasonably effective as far as DC mayors go.
but he's more sensible than many of those we've mentioned here.
He'd pull the West Coast votes.
Make Snoop SecofState. If Iran tried any gimmicks, he'd remind Ahmadinejad that we Americans stay strapped like a car seat.
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And statesmen at her council met
Who knew the seasons when to take
Occasion by the hand, and make
The bounds of freedom wider yet
- Tennyson, _To the Queen_
connection without Suge.........Wwwwwwwword....it's all about The Game
" Got to love the Lord for making things like that."
Morally Compromised
Like a West Coast Party
Cuz a West Coast Party
Got Gas!!!!
Tupac could promise us cheap gas again!
"I believe we must adjourn this meeting to some other place." - The last recorded words of Adam Smith.
two dolla woof a gas
" Got to love the Lord for making things like that."
Morally Compromised
A Snoop-Tupac ticket could not be defeated. It's already common knowledge they are 2 of Amerikaz Most Wanted.
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And statesmen at her council met
Who knew the seasons when to take
Occasion by the hand, and make
The bounds of freedom wider yet
- Tennyson, _To the Queen_
*********************************
And statesmen at her council met
Who knew the seasons when to take
Occasion by the hand, and make
The bounds of freedom wider yet
- Tennyson, _To the Queen_
Jesse Jackson
Robert Byrd
Maxine Waters
Tim Robbins
Larry David
Lorri David
Ward Churchill
Fidel
Carter
Rockford (Garner)
Dole (still has lead in that pencil though - Viva Viagra)
Rosie O'Donnell??
omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina
"Land of the Free and Home of da Whopper" Peter Griffin...Family Guy
conform and celebrate diversity....or else!!!
CLINT EASTWOOD. There's no other choice.
Rosie, O'Donnell.
Gay vote.........check
Truthers vote....check
Anti-war vote....check
Insane vote......check
Really I mean what does she not have!?!
uhhgggg...I think I just threw up a bit in my mouth
"Land of the Free and Home of da Whopper" Peter Griffin...Family Guy
conform and celebrate diversity....or else!!!
I, From ME to you, do hereby transfer all credit to aaronbg for nominating Rosie O'Donnell as a VP running mate for presumptive Republican™ Presidential nominee John McCain. This transfer is warranted by virtue of the obviously superior content of his post.
Given this day under my hand.
From ME to you (signed)
29 April 2008
omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina
"Land of the Free and Home of da Whopper" Peter Griffin...Family Guy
conform and celebrate diversity....or else!!!
I have way more intelligence than that. I had a business and my upstairs neighbors were lawyers. When they needed a witness for signatures I'd help them out.
Got great lawyer jokes from them!(e.g.)
Q: What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
A: They both have about a one in a billion chance of becoming human!
That one was from a lawyer!!!!
omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina
A good hairstyle, class, intelligence, good taste ...the list goes on but it's not 'family friendly' so I'll just leave it to your imaginations!
(What??...what are you thinking??....oh that's so sick!.....you guys should be ashamed of yourselves!!!!!)
omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina
"Land of the Free and Home of da Whopper" Peter Griffin...Family Guy
conform and celebrate diversity....or else!!!
"I believe we must adjourn this meeting to some other place." - The last recorded words of Adam Smith.
but I think she has better sense than to want elected office.
If she ran with her mother would that give us the:
"Clinton - Clinton - Clinton" ticket?
If she ran with Obama... would that then be the 'wet dream' ticket?
Just asking...
Jesse Ventura is trying to get back into politics. Personally, I support the Ted Nugent idea.
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Swamp Yankee:
1. New England trailer trash or northern redneck. - Urban Dictionary
need to share a stage together. It might be good TV.
Madeline Albright comes close but does not top.
Didn't she almost get elected president of the Czech Republic a few years back? I wonder how well the "personal union" concept works with presidencies?
"Any love letter is incomplete without a Ronald Reagan quote"
--my sophomore year roommate
Thread over.
"I ain't never votin' fo another Democrat so long as I can draw breath! I'll vote for a dog first!" - Leola Thomas
Alec Baldwin, after all he already knows his way around the West Wing.
you can put him to work for you with prank calls to your friends.
Okay, I have to quote this:
You are worthress Arec Barrwin
You are worthress Arec Barrwin
You have faiwred in every way
and now my stock in you has fawren
Your career is stawrin'
and you're worthress Arec Barrwin
That's why I brew your head off
And your chirdren are all bawrin'
---
Finrod's First Law of Bandwidth:
A picture may be worth a thousand words, but it takes the bandwidth of ten thousand.
if for no other reason than to completely confuse Hugo Chavez.
Miller, Lieberman was born a Democrat, Rothenberg's suggestion would be one McCain would seriously be considering. Also were it not for Fred's lack of enthusiasm on the stump and his clear statement he isn't interested in the Number 2 spot, he'd be another consideration.
that would nix Lieberman regardless of party. Now Lieberman for SecDef would be nice... and I believe GOV Rell (R) would appoint the replacement.
______________________________________
Donate to the Rs in Close Senate Races through Slatecard
He said it would be "very hard" to not pick a pro-lifer and said he wanted to make sure the pro-life plank of the party was respected. When asked if that would automatically deny someone like Tom Ridge, he said no, but that it would be "very hard," whatever that means.
I personally don't really care who his VP is, because they won't make any big decisions and I doubt in this case he or she will automatically be the frontrunner when McCain leaves, so I personally wouldn't mind Lieberman. But I do think he'll be taking a big risk if he picks someone like Lieberman or Ridge.
"I ain't never votin' fo another Democrat so long as I can draw breath! I'll vote for a dog first!" - Leola Thomas
Barbra Streisand.
(Or would that be Mecha-Streisand?)
---
Finrod's First Law of Bandwidth:
A picture may be worth a thousand words, but it takes the bandwidth of ten thousand.
or oprah stealing her from barry would be good.
Rudy
Jeb Bush - Yes, even Republicans are Bush-fatigued
Kay Bailey Hutchison
Lindsey Graham
Cuz' ya can't ever get enought Mavericosity....
Ron Reagan (Jr.)
it's just possible that he's the only one who'd be willing to spend that many hours a day with him. ;)
Fred Thompson, 2008
How about Bill Clinton's drug addict brother?. It might split the Clinton Machine. :)
...a long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right...
---Thomas Paine---
or Michael "Brownie" Brown. Either one would do a heckuva job.
Seriously, though...is Bobby Jindal on McCain's short list--or even his long list?
since holding onto LA is probably not on McCain's list of priorities;)
You're right. The timing would be bad for both Jindal and the GOP, and McCain needs a competent Republican in LA to make good on his promise to protect it from a cat5 hurricane.
Larry Craig
Al Sharpton
Tim Robbins
Sean Penn
Mike Gravel
John Kerry
OJ Simpson
Rosie O'Donnell
Gary Condit
They would get the...
Black vote
Gay vote
Womens vote
Felons vote
BDS vote
People who think steel doesn't melt vote
Did I miss any?.......
I think this ticket could win..except Rosie is not very Telegenic...have you been to her blog? eeewwwwwwww...
"40 million American households with guns are generally happier
than those people in households that don't have guns."
just on the off chance that OJ would kill Rosie.
"Nothing works like freedom, Nothing succeeds like liberty"
Kyle
Ron Paul and Alan Keyes both come to mind...
"No matter how much lipstick you put on the taxation pig, it's still a pig... and it's currently snout-down in your wallet." - Michael Fisk